Everything that is not done is for the better. Everything that is done is for the best

Failure happens to everyone. Someone endures them steadfastly, while other people get very upset, they give up and lose the desire to do anything. If you belong to the second category, this post is just for you. We firmly believe that whatever is done is for the best. Try to pull yourself together and see the good in every situation.

Every failure is a colossal experience

No one succeeds unless they have experienced failure. And even if everything in his life is going great from birth, the very first failure will deprive such a lucky one of his vitality. If you periodically encounter difficulties, then you should thank fate. Now you know how to solve many problems - you are not afraid to move on. Difficulties harden us, and hardly anyone will deny it.

This is what the most successful people have.

Look at the rich, famous and talented people. We often think that everything in their lives is wonderful and smooth. But just spend one evening reading the biographies of those who seem lucky to you. You will be surprised to find out what obstacles they had to go through to achieve success. Many of these people have repeatedly gone bankrupt and started from scratch, have been unemployed for years, and become objects of ridicule. Some of them lost loved ones or underwent serious treatment. There is not a single person in life whose life would be perfect and absolutely happy. Remember: if others have overcome difficulties, you can too.

Another failure. Your actions?

Something unpleasant happened again and are you ready to deal with it in the usual ways? It can be just despondency and doing nothing, a desire to feel sorry for yourself endlessly, attempts to cry into someone's vest. Or do you withdraw into yourself, start to seize failures, wash them down with alcohol? We know very well: none of those methods work. They don't help, they only make things worse. The ideal option to knock bad thoughts out of your head is to give a task to your body. Go in for sports, do hard physical work, go hiking. Give your brain the opportunity to free itself, drive away all thoughts from yourself and stop feeling sorry for yourself.

Stop waiting for instant results

If you want to achieve something and you are constantly not getting what you want, stop and think: maybe you want to get something in an instant that takes a whole year to achieve? In those circumstances that depend slightly on you, do not set yourself a strict framework. Don't say, "I'm doing a good job, so I'll be promoted next month." In this case, not only you decide. Say to yourself, “I did great this month. Next time I will work even better so that the boss has a reason to promote me when he needs a deputy. By formulating your expectations in a completely different way, you do not set limits on your brain, you do not violate them, and you are not disappointed.

Sometimes a small dream is more important than a big one.

This point is somewhat similar to the previous one. If you set yourself the goal of losing 20 kg, then with a high probability this is a road to nowhere. The long-awaited result does not come in any way, failure happens again. Break your dream into several small ones, start your journey with the desire to lose 5 kg and tighten some part of the body a little. In a month, you will be able to check the “done” box next to such a goal - then you can safely set the next one. By small steps, your goal will be achieved - and no unnecessary frustration.

Find a saving hobby

If you are a calm person, you will need something that causes a surge of emotions, an adrenaline rush. For example, take up rope jumping. If trouble happens again in your life - just go and get another boost of energy. Such a shake-up will give strength to survive the trouble and move on.

If there are so many upheavals in your life, choose something opposite for yourself - try to learn the art of calligraphy. When you need to feel sorry for yourself and get upset, you will calmly sit over a notebook and draw beautiful letters. This not only calms and distracts, but also helps to acquire an additional useful skill. There can be many options for a hobby, but the essence is the same: your life should not revolve around the same problems - dilute it with new colors every day.

Our mistakes are our path to a better life

Only those who do nothing do not make mistakes. Remind yourself often that only through trial and error can you truly find your way. And on this path you can not do without defeats, problems, troubles. It is they who make you that warrior who will surely win a significant victory in the future.

“Whatever is done, everything is for the better” is such a hymn to denial and rationalization. It was invented by those who did not find the moral strength in themselves to cope with the challenge of the human situation. Great consolation in the event of events out of control or an excuse for making the wrong choice?

Probably, I want to believe in harmony and the highest meaning of what is happening, inaccessible to us logic and wisdom beyond consciousness. But it's hard to rely on something you can't control. There are things that happen with varying degrees of regularity, but something is the result of a choice, including an unconscious one. For example, to be in a zone with an increased probability of a particular event is also a choice. And any choice leads to certain consequences - “good” or “bad”.

I'm afraid there is nothing predetermined: scenario, fate, guarantees. It is not easy to accept responsibility for what happened wrong, through our fault. This is a difficult moment. But in itself it is a challenge to maturity and a point of growth. How to come to terms with the fact that it turned out to be a consequence of the choice?

The main goal of Gestalt therapy is to repair the ego function. That is, to return or replenish the ability to make a choice, to be responsible for it and at the same time be satisfied with the course of one's own life. For to spend the rest of your days in regret about the previous ones is somehow irrational from the point of view of evolution. If we turn to the religions of the world, we will find that one of the common and most important ideas is the idea of ​​humility. Reconcile - be at peace. Do what needs to be done and come what may. Some things are up to us and some are not.

It is worth accepting as a starting point the fact that no one knows how life would have flowed if at that moment the choice had been decided differently. It will all remain in the fantasy zone. In reality, there are only consequences that need to be dealt with somehow. That's all.

The consequences may be different. Joyful - giving a sense of triumph, victory over circumstances, special luck. Or sad - leading to feelings of guilt, powerlessness, deep regret. Unpleasant feelings cannot be ignored. You can, with varying success, suppress them, push them out, still somehow try to get rid of them, or you can meet with them and live. In the first case, these are large expenditures of psychic energy, loss of time and stagnation. In the other, learning a lesson, even a bitter one, and reaching a new level. Having made a so-called mistake, you get a wonderful bonus - a kind of inoculation against stupidity! And in the light of this experience, much becomes clear.

In fact, making the right choice is not so easy. Setting priorities correctly, orienting yourself in what has not yet happened (predicting the future), feeling what will be important later ... It is not at all easy. I would say - on the verge of the possible. “To follow the stars”, to hear the subtlest voice of intuition, to trust it, to read the signs correctly, it does not always work, but when you are under stress.

Important decisions are always associated with excitement, and in a stressful state, we usually regress and become “stupid”. It is foolish to regret and reproach yourself for having chosen something that seemed important at that moment. At that moment, you were the person to whom this choice seemed the best possible. Then it is easy to argue that it would be necessary ...

It's bad if you don't make a choice at all. More precisely, there is still a choice - it is to react passively or to transfer responsibility to someone or something. But this, again, is rarely recognized as a choice. Everything that cannot be explained is endowed with an artificial meaning, fatalism is formed. Lucky in some situations - and a victim of circumstances in others.

In general, harsh realism is not popular. The magical paradigm is much nicer. But life is not for the weak.published .

Tatyana Martynenko

P.S. And remember, just by changing your consciousness - together we change the world! © econet

Whatever is done is for the best!

There are no wrong directions in life. Any path leads you to your goal. And if now you understand inside yourself that you are not doing something, that this is not something, not YOUR, someone else's - in fact it is not so ... You are moving exactly where you need to! But only if you really do something, and do not sit still and expect something from life - a miracle, a chance, an opportunity, and you yourself do not hit a finger on a finger.

Every action takes you where you need to go. Even if you don’t see now and don’t understand where and why. And it really doesn't matter. What matters is moving forward.

Now why is this so? In fact, every action you take develops you and embeds a bunch of knowledge and skills - the skill of setting and achieving goals, the skill of making decisions, the ability to get along and negotiate with people, the ability to overcome failures, and so on. Even if you are now engaged in an unloved business, you still develop it all in yourself. Whatever you do, you learn to understand yourself, you grow personally, you improve yourself ...

For what??? So that when the moment comes, use these skills to achieve YOUR GOAL. Everyone knows the expression - when the student is ready - the teacher comes. The same goes for YOUR goal. When you become ready for its realization, the opportunity for it comes to you. But if you don’t do anything, don’t move anywhere, don’t develop, just do the same thing - this opportunity will never appear, which means you will never reach your goal. And you will never live the way you want.

Here's a real example for you - Steve Jobs, the creator of Apple. While still a student, he enrolled in a calligraphy course that had nothing to do with anything. Just signed up - I wanted to. It would seem why and for what? But then this knowledge was put into the computer font system and now the whole world uses these fonts, information about which Steve Jobs received in calligraphy courses. And for you, the conclusion is simple - Any path leads you to your goal.

If you need more examples, read the biographies of successful people. They all went bankrupt, did the wrong thing, but eventually came to an understanding of their goals with the baggage of the necessary skills and knowledge and made a sharp leap forward. So wherever you are now, whatever you do, you are preparing to achieve your goal. Even if you still don’t see it on the horizon and have no idea what kind of goal it is ... This understanding will definitely come!

But it will come only to those who will go forward, act and develop! Instead of complaining about life, the government and employers and sitting on TV or on social media. networks - so you definitely won’t find your goal. So today you have added a solid plus to motivation! Take action! Now you know that Any path leads you to your goal!

It knows no boundaries, for all occasions there are all kinds of proverbs, sayings, parables, aphorisms, and, most surprisingly, in all situations in instructive phrases are different, and the conclusions are the same. The same words are repeated from generation to generation, but sometimes it is pronounced purely formally, without realizing the deep meaning in which the spiritual law is contained, and ignorance of this will not save from responsibility. For example, this happens with the expression: "Everything that is done is done for the better."

spiritual law

Nobody denies the laws of natural sciences (physical, chemical, biological, etc.), and, knowing them at least at the everyday level, people are guided and obey them in their lives. No one will jump from an airplane without a parachute, touch bare electrical wires (Ohm's law), dive into water without knowing how to swim. Spiritual laws were also discovered a long time ago and set forth, for example, in the Bible or other religious teachings, and, of course, they are reflected in the oral art of peoples. The spiritual law: “Everything that is done is done for the better” is not a banal soothing phrase, not a call for the best, but a chance to understand and accept what happened for further spiritual growth.

understand and accept

“Everything that is done is done for the better” is heard from all sides on any petty occasion. But as soon as it comes to serious tragedies, the human mind refuses to accept death as a science, it always looks for the culprit (he or they, of course, always exist), not understanding the main thing: everyone is involved in what happened. Everything is for the better - this is not a slogan of optimists who are not afraid of anything, but a law confirming the right of a person to choose. The choice is made every second: to go - not to go, to do - not to do, to think - not to think, to be silent - to speak. By taking action, a person chooses (albeit unconsciously) and the responsibility that he will bear for this, so the expressions “fate cheated” or “God punished” are actually soothing and justifying phrases for unbelieving people. No one punishes anyone for violating spiritual laws - only everyone punishes himself. This is hard to accept, because making excuses has become a habit. But just as it is useless to shout in the sky and make excuses that you forgot your parachute because you didn’t get enough sleep, it’s just as useless to wring your hands about a failed fate and look for those responsible for this.

Everything will be fine

Why is it that everything that is done is done for the better? What is done according to the law is understandable, but who said what is for the best? Probably because it is an axiom. It is accepted by the heart, and it is almost impossible to prove it to a closed soul. Once upon a time, at the dawn of civilization, knowledge of all laws was given to man, but he preferred to cultivate the natural sciences, because they opened the way to profit and power. But not paying attention to spiritual commandments means signing a death sentence for yourself, as can be seen in the history of recent centuries: the more sophisticated and grandiose the discoveries, the more ruthless people are towards each other, the louder they shout about peace, the bloodier the wars, the more More medicine means more disease. But the universe still gravitates towards good, and therefore everything that is done is done for the better, even if soon there will not be a single person left in the Universe.