Address to a Turkish man. Myth eight: Turkish is a rough language

During one of the classes, I found out with my teacher how, when, to whom and with what words it is more appropriate to address people. After all, in the Turkish language this is also a special section.
The most respectful addresses in communication are “bey” (“beat”) for men and “hanım” (“hanim”) for women. These particles are usually attached to the name. “Mehmet Bey”, “Olga Khanum”... If they address you like this, it means they are showing special affection and want to emphasize respect for you. Sometimes they also use bay (for men) and bayan (for women). Yes, you can find these same inscriptions, for example, on the toilet door. You should be more careful not to mix it up)).
Somewhere in the market or in a shop you can hear someone say “abi-cim” (for men) or abla-cim (“abla-jim”), which translates quite nicely: “brother”, “sister”. Literally it looks something like this: “Sister, dear, take good tomatoes, and strawberries from the garden just today.” In general, this could be regarded as familiarity, if not for the wide smiles and sincerity of the sellers. Most of them are simple guys from villages, where such treatment is completely appropriate, and just shows a kind attitude towards a person. In Turkey it’s like this: the more often you see a person, for any reason, be it an au pair coming to you, the attitude will warm up, which is immediately reflected in the words addressed. So, “hanim” after some time can turn into “teyze-cim” (“teyze-jim”), “auntie”.
In Turkey, it is also amazing how much they try to emphasize respect for elders in their language. I think this is also a very important part of culture. We should also be more careful with this and once again add the necessary particles. I have heard many times how even small children, for example, constantly add “abi” to the names of their older brothers.
It must be said that men somehow have more opportunities to “decorate” their speech when addressing each other. This is the respectful “abi”, which sounds different from a man’s mouth, and the slightly mischievous “kaptan” (“kaptan”) in relation to the driver, and this is especially “usta” (“usta”) - “master”. They can address this way, emphasizing respect, both to their boss or partner, with whom they have already established a close relationship, and to some truly master of their craft - a cook, a mechanic... She specifically clarified that, after all, a decent “khanym” cannot afford to address to men in this way, so that women are left with only the almost standard “canım” (“janym”), “my soul”, “dear”, which, unfortunately, the Turks insert into and out of business, without even thinking, how deep a meaning this word carries. For most of them, almost everything is “janym”. True, of course, there are people who can use this word exclusively for loved ones and relatives. However, there is one expression where canım does not carry that special meaning. “Yok canım”, “yok dzhanym” - “no”, when they simply answer a question in the negative and this “dzhanym” just automatically rolls off the tongue))).
For wives there is also “karı” (“punishments”), for husbands “koca” (“koja”). Don’t repeat my mistakes and confuse “koca” with “hoca” (“hoja”), “teacher”. When I “mixed it up” more than once in a conversation, my Turkish teacher laughed for a long time afterwards. Although in reality these calls are used less often. To designate their husband or wife they can now say “eşim” (“eshim”).
There are also hooligan “avrat”, “baba” and “herif”, “man” - but these are very rude words, so you can only “screw them in” in a joking conversation with your husband ))). But I warn you about these words just in case, in order to avoid mistakes and awkward situations.
I hope the information will definitely be useful to you for living in Turkey!

There were several questions on this topic, and it seemed to me that it would be easier to write one explanatory post for those interested. I emphasize that this does not mean that it should be this way and only this way. This is rather information for your information, as it may be.

1. In the state of the Great Seljuks Persian was the official and literary language. It was used by the local administration, literary works were written on it. In some branches of science, education and law, Arabic was used. There is no information about the role of the Oghuz language (Turkic) in the life of the Seljuk state.
Muslim theologians and jurists wrote in Arabic, poets - in Persian. Iranian theologians and poets already surrounded Sultan Kilych-Arslan and his sons, one of whom even bore the Persian name Kay-Khyusrev. ... Thus, the cultural life of the Turks of Asia Minor was served to a greater extent by the Persian language, and to a lesser extent by the Arabic language.
The people spoke Turkic, and then mostly outside the cities. The cities were diverse in composition. Absolutely everything Turkic was alien to the townspeople, as well as the Turkic aristocracy..
(c) V.G. Guzev "Old Ottoman language"

2. Due to the fact that there are very few written sources left from the Seljuks, we also have little information about their customs. To make life easier for everyone, I suggest using early Ottoman titles and addresses , which in general are a fusion of Persian, Arabic and Turkic words. They are just more familiar to us, we have all heard a little about them. For example:

Khazretleri- his/her majesty/highness

Sultan, padishah, hyunkar, khan- about the Sultan. Example: Sultan Alparslan Khan Hazretleri - His Majesty Sultan Alparslan.

Shehzade hazretleri- appeal to the heir. Shehzade Ruknaddin hazretleri - His Highness "Prince" Ruknaddin

Vizier- title of chief ministers and high dignitaries

Pasha- a high title in the political system. At first, governors and generals were called pashas, then any high-ranking official. It is also used as an honorary title, equal to "sir" or "mister". Haydar Pasha or simply "pasham" - my pasha, my master

hit- sir. Military and administrative rank. Bey - leader, led clan militia in a general tribal army. Gradually it became a polite way of addressing a respected person. Example: Kadir Bey

yeah- the title of military leaders, as well as some heads of groups of court servants who were on salary. Also the word "aha" inmeans "elder brother" or "uncle". Kiraz-aga

effendi- respectful "Mr.". Polite address to noble persons up to the Sultan, to all literate citizens. In general, “effendi” is an officer rank corresponding to lieutenant. Salim effendi.

Descending - pasha, bey, yeah, effendi

Hanim Effendi- respect. "Madam". Example: Leyla Khanum or Khanum Effendi. “Khanim-effendi, may I come in”?

Khatun- a noble woman, an appeal to the ladies of the court. Example: Zelikha Khatun

Mufti -a Muslim clergyman, theologian and lawyer who had the right to issue a fatwa, i.e. a legal opinion giving legal force or declaring illegal certain actions of the authorities. The Grand Mufti, or Sheikh-ul-Islam, was considered the head of the Muslim community.

Celebi- advisor, cleric among Muslims. Also called heirs to the throne, princes, princes: Evliya-celebi

cadi- judge under Sharia law or in a broader sense

haji- a person who has performed the Hajj

A little about the harem to get acquainted with the system and morals :)

Jariye- all the girls who ended up in the harem are the lowest level

kalfa- a servant from the palace staff, a former jariye. I could no longer count on contact with the Sultan.

Mouth- diligently completed the entire period of training in jariyya. It was among the mouth that candidates were chosen for relations with the Sultan and further possible career advancement.

Gözde- former usta, a woman whom the Sultan noticed and spent at least one night with her

Iqbal- a concubine who became the Sultan's constant favorite

Khaznedar- treasurer and administrator of the harem

Kadyn- a former iqbal who bore only a daughter to the Sultan, or whose sons died

Sultan- a former iqbal who gave birth to a son. And also all the daughters and sisters of the padishah who cannot rise above this title.

Haseki- inalienable title of the Sultan's beloved wife

Valide, Valide Sultan is the highest female title. The concubine received this title if her son officially became the next sultan. Valide ruled the harem.

3. Extremely common and atmospheric words

Mashalla- a sign of amazement, joy, praise and gratitude to God and humble recognition that everything happens according to the will of Allah. A talismanic phrase when pronouncing praise, approval, admiration. Analogue “Thank God!”, “Well done!” “Mashalaa, what a beautiful child you have,” “Be happy, mashalla!”

Inshallah- if God wishes, if there is God’s will. Accompanies statements about plans or events. Expresses hope that plans will be fulfilled. “God willing!”, “With God’s help!” “Inshallah, everything will work out for you”, “Don’t worry - inshallah, she will come”

When I came to Turkey for the first time and heard Turkish speech, it seemed terribly rude and ugly to me. But, having become more familiar with the Turkish language, I realized how wrong I was. In the vocabulary of even the simplest and most uneducated Turk, you can, to your surprise, find a lot of phrases and expressions that show how highly developed the culture of communication is in Turkey and how much secularism there is in it - which, in my opinion, is so lacking in the modern Russian language. When I come from Turkey to Russia, I really miss these polite turns of phrase and expressions that abound in the Turkish language. For any occasion, the Turks have phrases for encouragement, consolation and praise, decorating the conversation and making communication more pleasant. I personally call such expressions “bows.”

There is probably an analogue for each such expression in Russian, but for some reason they are either a thing of the past or simply not used in everyday life.

If, for example, you pass by the same shops and workshops every day, then, in addition to the usual greeting, you can wish their owners a good job: “Hayırlı işler!”, or say “Kolay gelsin”, which literally translates as “Let it comes (comes) easily.” This phrase, by the way, can be said to anyone who is busy with something - doing homework, preparing dinner, fixing something, or to someone who is going to do something.

Someone who is just starting a new business or job is told “Başarılı olsun” - “success”, or “Hayırlı olsun” - “prosperity”.

Turks say “Bon appetit” (“afiyet olsun”) not only before eating, but also after. To praise the cooking of a Turkish hostess, you can say “Ellerine sağlık” - “Health to your hands” as a thank you. To which the hostess will again tell you “afiyet olsun”, which in this case will mean “to your health”.

You can wish health not only to the cook, and not only to your hands. Similar expressions are appropriate for other parts of the body: if you liked his singing, you wish the singer healthy throat, the dancer – healthy legs, and so on. 🙂

When someone sneezes, the Turks say "çok yaşa", which means "live long." At the same time, the person who has just sneezed answers “sen de gör” - “and you will see (how long I live)”, or “hep beraber” - “all together” (we will live long).

If someone is sick, has just recovered, or has experienced something bad (except the death of loved ones), the Turks say “geçmiş olsun”, which means “let it remain in the past.” The same is wished for passengers on planes, trains and branded intercity buses after arriving at their destination, when they say goodbye to passengers - it is believed that the road, no matter how pleasant it may be, is always a test and inconvenience.

It is wrong to say “geçmiş olsun” to a person who has lost a loved one. In this case, the Turks say “başınız sağ olsun”, that is, they wish them to be in good health no matter what.

Guests, visitors to shops, restaurants and other establishments are greeted with the words “hoş geldiniz” - “it’s good that you came”, or in our opinion, “welcome”, to which the guests respond with the expression “hoş bulduk”, which is still not very clear to me, which roughly translates to “we found it pleasant” or “it’s good that we found it.” Indeed, it’s nice that such a greeting can be heard almost everywhere – from a small shop to a branded boutique.

If you purchased a new thing, then, depending on its purpose, they say to you: “Güle güle giy” - “wear with pleasure” - about clothes, “Güle güle oturun” - about a new apartment, or the general phrase “Güle güle kullanın” - “use with pleasure.”

To someone who has just washed, had a haircut or shaved, they say “sıhhatler olsun” - a special wish for health, like our “enjoy your steam.”

Even to say goodbye, the Turks do not make do with just the expression “Goodbye”: those who remain say “hoşça kalın” - “stay happily”, and those who leave say “güle güle”, which literally means “laughing”. In fact, this is a shortened form of “güle güle git, güle güle gel” - “leave laughing, come laughing.” The person leaving can also say “Allah’a ısmarladık” - “We leave you to the will of Allah.” Those who set out on a journey are wished “iyi yolculuklar” - “a happy journey.” By the way, when I didn’t know about expressions like “Güle güle giy” (“wear with pleasure”), I thought that the sellers were saying goodbye to me, trying to get me out of the store as quickly as possible. 🙂

“Selamün aleyküm!” - “Aleyküm selam!”

To fully cover the topic of communication culture in Turkey, it is worth talking about the features of everyday communication.

Turks greet each other with phrases that suit the time of day, and “good afternoon” and “good evening” can also be used to say goodbye. Conservative Muslims prefer “Selamün aleyküm”, which means “peace be upon you”, to secular greetings; one should respond with “Aleyküm selam” - “peace be upon you too”.

“Selam” seems to be a short form of “Selamün aleyküm”, but this is not so. “Selam” is more of a youth greeting, used among peers or in the family circle, like our “hello” or “salute”.

The custom of kissing on both cheeks when greeting and goodbye made me laugh a lot at first - imagine a group of young guys kissing each other in the middle of the street. Now I’ve somehow gotten used to this, besides, as it turned out, kissing someone is not at all necessary - Turks usually kiss cheek to cheek, while young people in their company may do this by touching their foreheads to each other.

It is customary to greet older family members, especially on holidays, by kissing their hand. The kiss here can also be symbolic - the wrist is applied to the chin, and then to the forehead. Hands are kissed not only by older people, but also by those who are respected and loved.

Like us, when meeting, Turks usually ask about each other’s affairs by saying “nasılsınız?” - “how are you?”, and it is not customary to answer “fine” or talk about your problems - usually everyone answers “iyiyim” - “good”, or simply says “thank you” - “teşekkür ederim”, asking in response about business interlocutor - “Siz nasılsınız?” - “How are you?” To say that things are so-so - “şöyle böyle” - is accepted only by close people. After the greeting, questions follow about the health of each other’s relatives, the state of work, etc., to which they also usually answer that everything is in order, thank Allah, and this continues the longer, the less often people see each other. Although this “exchange of pleasantries” from the outside may seem unnecessary and hypocritical (you still can’t really learn from it about the real state of affairs), its meaning is to show that you are not indifferent to the affairs of your interlocutor and the health of his family members, and Whether he wants to tell you the details is his business.

It can be funny to watch how the owner of the house asks each guest individually about his affairs, then the hostess begins to ask after him.

Alternative forms of the question “how are you doing” can confuse a foreigner who has just started learning Turkish - they are not written about in textbooks or phrase books. However, they are often used in everyday speech. One of these questions sounds like “ne yapıyorsun?”, that is, “what are you doing?” Previously, I was usually at a loss: why is it that the person I just greeted suddenly asks what I am doing, and what should he answer? It turns out that this question should be perceived as an ordinary “how are you” and answered with “iyiyim” - “I’m fine” or simply “iyi” - good.

Among friends, the questions “Ne var ne yok?” are also popular. and "Naber?" The first can be translated as “What is, what is not?”, and the second comes from “Ne haber?” - “What news?” You can answer “iyi”, “iyidir”, “iyilik”, etc. in response to “Ne var ne yok?” they ask “Sende ne var ne yok?”, to “Naber?” - “Senden naber?”

Gratitude in Turkish is not limited to just the word “thank you”. You can choose a word that suits the degree of your gratitude from a whole arsenal: “teşekkür ederim”, “teşekkürler” - “thank you”, “sağ ol” or “sağ olasın” - “thank you”, “eyvallah” - “uh-huh” (my informal translation ), “Allah razı olsun” - “God bless you,” etc. I note that all these words and expressions are in Russian, but, unlike Turkish, for some reason they are not in use here :)

And, of course, there are several options for responding to gratitude: “rica ederim” - “please” (literally - “I ask you”), “bir şey değil” and “ne demek” - “nothing”, “no need to thank” "

If many of the above words and expressions are just decoration for the conversation, then there are some things, for not using which, in some cases, a person will be considered rude. For example, it is considered indecent to simply talk about what successes you have achieved, where you vacationed, even about what you ate - that is, about everything that may not be available to your interlocutor due to his financial or social status. To prevent your speech from being considered bragging, you must say before it “Söylemesi ayıp” - “ashamed to speak” (“do not consider it immodesty”).

Don’t worry if you don’t have enough knowledge of all the secrets of Turkish etiquette - the Turks make allowances for foreigners due to the difference in mentality, but they are very happy when they see that you are trying to behave in accordance with it.

Don't remember God in vain

It seems that the Turks do not know this expression. Everything in the life of Muslims is done according to the will of Allah, with his permission (“Allah izin verirse” - “If Allah allows”) and with his help. And, of course, the Turks have a suitable phrase for every occasion. These expressions have become so firmly established in everyday life that their use is not at all an indicator of religiosity - even the most atheistically minded Turks use them.

One of the most frequently used exclamations among the Turks is “Allah Allah!” – depending on the intonation, it can express surprise, indignation, irritation, irony, and many other emotions. The one who pronounces it, thus, calls on Allah to witness what is happening and judge the situation fairly.

When starting to do something, before eating, going on a trip or even entering city transport, many say: “Bismillah” - “In the name of Allah”, if the matter is serious, then they say “Bismillahirrahmanirrahim” - “In the name of Allah, the Gracious and Merciful "

Often, to the question “How are you?” The Turks respond with “Çok şükür” - “thank God.” When expressing hope, Turks rarely say “I hope”; more often you hear “inşallah” - “if God willing.”

To a person who is doing something difficult, they say “Allah kolaylık versin” or “Allah yardımcı olsun” - “May Allah help you.” Often, when things are hopeless, this phrase is said ironically.

Sometimes they ask Allah to punish the offender: “Allah kahretsin!” or “Allah belani versin!” - “Allah punish you.” Often this curse is “disguised” by saying “Allah belanı vermesin!” - “May Allah not punish you.” If you hear this phrase from a Turk who was made to laugh very much, then do not be afraid - this is not a curse, but an expression of admiration for your sense of humor. However, you should not use it with unfamiliar people. In this case, the phrase “Sen beni güldürdün, Allah da seni güldürsün” is more appropriate - “You made me laugh, so may Allah make you laugh.”

The Turks are quite superstitious, they are especially afraid of the evil eye of children. If you admire someone else's child, then it is best to add “maşallah” after this - something like “Allah protect from the evil eye.” Truckers like to write “Maşallah” on their trucks. “Maşallah” is also said when one admires something (“What a beauty!”) or wants to politely express one’s envy, for example, about a friend’s new car. 🙂

"Woman! Yes, I’m telling you!”

I have always been offended by the fact that in Russia people are forced to communicate with each other based on gender. What a pity that addresses once used in Tsarist Russia now sound either too official or somehow mocking.

In Turkey, there are such appeals for every taste. There are even several types of appeals: official, secular and common.

In general, in Turkey it is customary to address each other by name, partly because surnames are a relatively new phenomenon here. The only titles used with the surname are Bay ("Mr") and Bayan ("Madam") - analogues of the English "Mr. and Mrs." However, they are mainly used when dubbing American films.

If you don’t know the person’s name, then you can address a man as “Béyeféndi” - (“Sir”), and a woman as “Hanımeféndi” (“Madam”). There is also a universal appeal - “Efendim” - suitable for people of both sexes or a group of people. Some very polite people add "Efendim" to the end of every sentence, which makes their speech full of respect and dignity at the same time.

If you know a person and communicate with him officially, then you need to add “Bey” to the name (if he is a man), and “Hanım” if he is a woman. For example: Ali Bey, Emine Hanım.

Instead of a name, you can use a profession:
Polis Bey – Mr. Policeman
Doktor Hanım – Madam Doctor
Şoför Bey! - Mr. Driver!

Exceptions include professions that rather determine a person’s status: children at school, like their parents, colleagues and superiors, address teachers not by their first and patronymic names, as in our country, and not by their last name, as, for example, in America, but “ öğretmenim" ("my teacher") or "hocam" ("my mentor"). It is customary to address masters in any trade (shoemaker, tailor, cook, confectioner) as “usta” - “master”.

When communicating more closely, Turks use other addresses. For example, within a family, younger children, when addressing older brothers and sisters, will certainly add “abi” (“elder brother”) or “abla” (elder sister), for example, “Mehmet abi” - just like “Brother Rabbit and Brother Fox " You can simply address your older brother as “abi”, and your sister as “abla”.

The same appeals can be heard in the conversation of complete strangers. In my opinion, this shows the warmth and friendliness of the Turks towards each other (and not only). Addressing a stranger as if you were a relative sets a completely different tone for communication between people.

Children, even strangers, are addressed as “oğlum” ([olum] - “my son”, “son”), and girls - “kızım” ([kyzym] - “my daughter”, “daughter”).

Older women are addressed as “abla”, men – “abi”. "Teyzé" - although translated as "aunt", is used in relation to older women, whom we would address as "grandmother". Be careful: don’t call a woman “teyze” who, although old enough to be your aunt, is still not quite a grandmother—she may be very offended. “Grandfathers” are addressed as “amca” ([amja] – “uncle”).

If a woman communicates with her husband’s friends or does shopping with him, then she is usually addressed not as “abla”, but as “yenge” ([yenge]) - “brother’s wife”.

Very often, especially when talking to children, Turks add “canım” ([janim]) - “dear”. However, this “janym” in adult speech can carry more than just a warm connotation. Depending on the situation, this address may have a patronizing (“darling”, “buddy”), arrogant, sarcastic or mocking tone. This word can also be heard in some expressions like “tabii canım!” - “naturally”, “of course!”, or, for example, “yok canım” and “hadi canım” - “come on!”, “stop it!”, “stop it.”

I guess I'll stop here. I think you no longer have any doubt that Turks are pleasant conversationalists. 🙂 Probably, the article turned out to be a bit dry and similar to a Turkish phrasebook, but I hope that it will be useful to those who are learning the Turkish language or trying to understand the intricacies of Turkish etiquette.

Phrasebook

(some words and expressions mentioned in this article)

Hayırlı işler [hayyrly ischler] – “Good job”
Kolay gelsin [kolay gelsin] – “Let it come (come) easily”, “God help”
Başarılı olsun [basharyly olsun] – wish for success
Hayırlı olsun [hayyrly olsun] – wish for prosperity (usually a new business or acquisition)
Afiyet olsun [afiyat olsun] – “Bon appetit”
Ellerine sağlık [ellerine saalyk] - “Health to your hands” - praise to the hostess for the food
Çok yaşa [chok yasha] – “Be healthy”, “live long”
Sen de gör [sen de gör] - “and you will see (how long I live)”
Hep beraber [hep beraber] - “all together” (we will live long)
Geçmiş olsun [gechmiş olsun] – “let it remain in the past”
Başınız sağ olsun [bashynyz sa olsun] - expression of condolences when a person loses a loved one
Hoş geldiniz [hosh geldiniz] – “welcome”
Hoş bulduk [hosh bulduk] - the guests’ response to “welcome”
Güle güle giy [gule güle giy] - “wear with pleasure”
Güle güle kullanın [güle güle kullanın] – “use with pleasure”
Sıhhatler olsun [sykhatler olsun] - “with light steam”, “with a haircut”
Hoşça kalın [khoshcha kalyn] – “stay happily”
Güle güle [güle güle] – “goodbye” (says the one who remains)
Allah'a ısmarladık [Allah ısmarladık] - “We leave you to the will of Allah”
İyi yolculuklar [iyi yoljuluklar] – “bon voyage”
Selamün aleyküm [selamyun aleyküm] - “peace be upon you”
Aleyküm selam [aleikum selyam] - “peace to you too”
Nasılsınız? [nasylsynyz] – “how are you?”
Siz nasılsınız? [syz nasylsynyz] - “How are you?”
Şöyle böyle [schöyle böyle] – “so-so”
Ne yapıyorsun? [ne yapyyorsun] - colloquial. “How are you”, lit. "What are you doing?"
İyiyim [iyiyim] – “I’m fine”
İyi [iii] – good
Ne var ne yok? [ne var ne yok] - “how are you?”, “what’s new?”
Naber? [naber] - “What news?”
Sende ne var ne yok? [sende ne var ne yok] - “what’s new with you?”
Senden naber? [senden naber] - “what news do you have?”
Teşekkür ederim [teşekkür ederim] – “thank you”, “thank you”
Sağ ol [sa ol], sağ olasın [sa olasyn] - “thank you”
Eyvallah [eyvallah] – “uh-huh” (my informal translation)
Allah razı olsun [Allah razı olsun] - “God bless you”
Rica ederim [rija ederim] - “please” (literally - “I ask you”)
Bir şey değil [Bir şey değil] – “nothing for it”, “not worth gratitude”
Ne demek [ne demek] – “no way”, “not worth gratitude”
Söylemesi ayıp [soylemesi ayıp] - “ashamed to say”, “do not consider it immodesty”

Allah izin verirse [Allah izin verirse] - “If Allah allows”
Allah Allah! [Allah Allah] – “God, God”
Bismillah [bismillah] – (“In the name of Allah”)
Bismillahirrahmanirrahim [bismillahirrahmanirrahim] - “In the name of Allah, the Beneficent and the Merciful”
Çok şükür [chok şükür] - “thank God”
İnşallah [inshallah] – “if God willing,” “God willing, …”
Allah kolaylık versin [Allah kolaylık versin] - “May Allah make your lot easier”
Allah yardımcı olsun [Allah yardımcı olsun] - “May Allah help you”
Allah kahretsin [Allah kahretsin] - “Allah punish you”
Allah belanı versin [Allah belyany versin] - “Allah punish you”, “may you be wrong”
Allah belani vermesin! [Allah belyany vermesin] - “Allah do not punish you”
Sen beni güldürdün, Allah da seni güldürsün [sen beni güldürdün Allah da seni güldürsün] - “You made me laugh, so may Allah make you laugh”
Maşallah [mashallah] - “Allah protect from the evil eye”, as well as “What a beauty!”

Going to an unfamiliar country without first familiarizing yourself with its traditions and customs is the same as going to a foreign monastery with your own rules. Sometimes, due to ignorance of any peculiarities of the country you are visiting, you can find yourself in an awkward situation, or even lead to a conflict.

Turkey, like any other Muslim country, has its own norms and rules of behavior. And failure to comply with them can lead to serious consequences, including not only fines, but also the possible detention of the tourist.

In contact with

Dressing correctly

Standard tourist clothing is a T-shirt and shorts. But it is not possible to appear in Turkish society in such a “uniform” everywhere.

Such attire is appropriate only on the beach or on the embankment in a resort town. The Turks, of course, are accustomed to the influx of tourists and free European morals, but still there is no point in tempting fate once again.

A place where such clothing is not allowed in principle is a religious institution, a mosque. Covered knees and shoulders are required there, and a woman must only be in the mosque with her head covered.

Türkiye is a country of numerous mosques, in one there is a huge number of them, as well as,.

When visiting excursions, it is better to dress practical and comfortable - naturally, no stilettos or mini heels. It is better if it is simple cotton clothing (a T-shirt with sleeves or a shirt, breeches). It is best to wear closed sandals or fabric slippers on your feet.

If you are planning an excursion to mountainous areas or to archaeological sites, shoes with hard soles are best. And don’t forget about a hat, otherwise sunstroke or heatstroke under the scorching sun is guaranteed. We recommend taking a tour to,.

While in our country you can calmly ask a question to a stranger, in Turkey such behavior is unacceptable. There is an important point: a woman can only address a Turkish woman, and a man can only address a Turkish man. If everything happens exactly the opposite, awkward situations may arise.

For example, a Turkish man may take a woman’s request for any reason (how to get to some attraction or where the nearest stop is) as flirtation, and then it will be very difficult to prove that this is not really the case. A man also cannot ask a question to a Turkish woman - otherwise it will be regarded as harassment.

Often, especially in a non-resort town or small village, there are quite colorful locals in national clothes, and tourists feel the need to capture this in a photo. Doing this is extremely undesirable - such a manifestation of disrespect (according to the Turks themselves) can even cause aggression. You can get acquainted with the population of Istanbul by clicking on.

This is especially true for women in veils and pregnant women. If you are going to photograph an interesting building or local residents, be sure to ask permission.

You should not address a Turk simply by name, as this may be regarded as an insult or disrespect. It is imperative to add a special prefix to a person’s name: “bey” - master (for example, Khairullah Bey), “khanum” or “khanum” - lady (for example, Khatice Khanum).

When addressing you, Turks may use the prefix “effendi” (or “efendim”), which literally means “my lord.” This is standard treatment from waiters, receptionists, and other service personnel.

By the way, Turks calmly communicate with tourists in English, French and German. At least most of the phrases used by foreign tourists are familiar to them.

And here It is not recommended to speak Turkish, unless, of course, you are fluent in it. Without knowing all the nuances and subtleties of the language (not to mention the correct pronunciation), you can simply look ridiculous. You will find useful information about it on the relevant websites.

By the way, be careful with gestures: everything that has one meaning in our country can have the exact opposite meaning in Turkey. For example, a raised finger, which in our country means approval, is considered an extremely indecent gesture in Turkey.

If a Turk clicks his tongue, it is a sign of a negative attitude or denial, but snapping his fingers is a clear approval.
If we shake our heads, for us it means “no,” but for a Turk it is a sign for “I don’t understand.”

Behavior at a party

It is not customary to refuse an invitation to visit Turkey. The Turks are generally a very hospitable nation, and guests are treated with all honor and respect. Guests are sure to come with a sweet gift, and guests from other countries are not forbidden to take with them any souvenir from their country. For sweets, traditional or.

You must take off your shoes before entering the house., guests are offered special slippers (you can bring your own if you wish). In a Turkish house there is a “guest half” and a “host half”.

It is forbidden to enter the owner's half, and the residents of Turkey themselves do not show their home to guests - it is simply not customary there. The house must remain closed to prying eyes.

It is also not customary to refuse a treat. You should definitely try any dish that the lady of the house offers, even if you don’t feel like it, at least a piece. Otherwise, you can insult the owners of the house. You should only take food from a shared plate or tray with your right hand. All conversations at the table are allowed only with the permission of the head of the family - in Turkey, like ours, it is not customary to have table conversations or talk about business.

The first rule of visiting mosques is a special dress code. Muslims are very strict about appearance. If you plan to visit any mosque, you need to wear something that covers your shoulders and knees - a T-shirt with sleeves, a skirt below the knee, or in extreme cases, breeches below the knee.

A headscarf is required for women. In case the tourist does not have such clothes, at the entrance to the mosque you can take a large scarf as security and throw it over your head, covering your shoulders.

Before entering the mosque, you must take off your shoes. You can leave it right at the doorstep or in a special bag on the shelf at the entrance.

Loud conversations are also not allowed in the mosque. And even more so, you should not point your finger at those praying and take pictures of them during prayer. In some mosques, photography and video shooting are generally prohibited (there are warning signs). And it is extremely undesirable to combine the time of visiting the mosque with the time of prayers - foreign tourists may not be allowed into the mosque at this time.

The fact is that during Ramadan all mosques are closed to tourists, and almost all the staff of restaurants, hotels and other entertainment establishments go home. During Ramadan, Turks observe a very strict fast.

Although the Turkish authorities assure that there are no problems with drinking water in the country, but still It’s better to play it safe and buy bottled drinking water in supermarkets. If you receive an invitation to a restaurant from a resident of Turkey, then know that the inviter usually pays.

Joint payment of a check in a restaurant in Turkey is not accepted in principle. You can, of course, offer to participate in the payment, but you will receive a firm, polite refusal.

There are many unfamiliar dishes in restaurants that you really want to try. But the body may not react completely normally to something unfamiliar, so when going on a trip, be sure to take with you some medications that will help with allergic reactions or food poisoning (antihistamines, adsorbents).

In all restaurants and cafes it is customary to leave a tip. The tip size, as in European countries, is standard - 5% of the total order amount. But if you want to thank the waiter for the excellent and polite service, you can leave the amount a little more than the required amount, this is not forbidden.

Eastern trade is, first of all, bargaining. Bargaining in Turkey is not only possible, but also necessary.

Turks always quote prices for goods to tourists that are twice or even three times higher than the actual cost. And only after a fair amount of haggling, you can get closer to the original cost of the goods without overpaying several times.

It should be noted that if you want to purchase a real product, and not its cheap analogue, then it is better to make a purchase in a store, and not on.

— the opportunity to purchase exclusive goods at a price without state duty.
The Karain Cave contains many still unsolved mysteries. Maybe you will be the next one to try to unravel its secrets? Click and find out detailed information.

Sometimes some little thing can really spoil the whole vacation and blur the impressions of visiting Turkey. So it’s better to take an interest in the customs and traditions of the country in advance. By following these simple rules, you can get only positive emotions from your trip to Turkey.

There is no arguing about tastes and colors. Turkish proverb

Türkiye, like a patchwork quilt, is bright and multifaceted. Over thousands of years, the culture of this country has absorbed the customs of many peoples of the Mediterranean, Middle East, Caucasus, Eastern Europe and Central Asia.

Modern Türkiye is a tolerant state where guests are welcome. But, like any other people, the Turks are pleased when visitors know their traditions. If they see that you observe local etiquette, rest assured that the Turks will show you the utmost respect and reverence.

Peace in the country, peace in the world

Türkiye is a Muslim country. 96% of the population professes Islam. However, Türkiye is the first Muslim country where religion is separated from the state.

However, it is worth remembering that Islam has a huge influence on the culture and daily life of local residents. Many rules of etiquette are dictated by the peculiarities of this religion.

If in large cities there are a lot of progressive, Europeanized youth (girls do not wear headscarves, couples can walk hand in hand, etc.), then in the Turkish outback morals are much stricter.

Turks are sensitive to their history. And the main figure in its modern segment is Mustafa Ataturk.

He made Turkey what it is now, and the Turks are grateful to him for that. To say that Ataturk is revered would be an understatement. To speak negatively about this political leader is to disrespect the Turkish people.

There are also two topics that it is better not to touch upon when communicating with Turks - the Kurds and Cyprus. In addition, you should not call Istanbul Constantinople and confuse the capital of the state (the main city of Turkey now is Ankara).

Taaagil!

When arriving at a Turkish resort, we rarely bother to learn the local phrases of greeting and farewell. But in vain! Turks are very pleased when they hear “Merhaba” from a foreigner.

“Merhaba” (“merhaba” (sometimes the “h” is not pronounced)) is a common greeting, translated as “Hello!”

You can also often hear “Selam” (“selam”), which means “Hello!” and is used in informal settings.

When leaving, they say “Iyi günler” (“Iyi gunler”), which literally translates as “Good afternoon!”, but when saying goodbye it means “All the best!” You can also say goodbye by saying:

Güle güle (“güle güle”) - Goodbye (say those who remain).
Hoşça kal (“hoshcha kal”) – Stay happily (says the one leaving).
Goruüşürüz (“gerüşürüz”) - See you.

As for non-verbal communication, men (!), if they are close friends or relatives, can hug and kiss each other on the cheek when they meet. Strangers greet each other with handshakes (they always give their right hand).

If during a meeting a woman offers her hand for a handshake, it looks strange. Because of this, tourists often get into trouble. For a Turk, sometimes this gesture means that the woman is ready to get to know each other very closely.

Turkish etiquette strictly regulates relations between people of different generations. Turks revere old people. When addressing elders (if they are not relatives or close friends), it is customary to add a respectful suffix to the name - “bey” (“lord”) or “hanim” (“madam”).

Relatives of the older generation are greeted by kissing the hand (the back of the hand) and applying it to the forehead.

To the question “How are you?” (“Nasılsiniz” - “Nasylsynyz”) most often answer positively - it is not customary to complain about one’s worries.

But you should definitely use “magic” words:

Teşekkürler (“mother-in-law”) or teşekkür ederim (“teshekkür ederim”) - thank you.
Lütfen (“Lyutfen”) - please (request).
Bir şey değil (“Bir schey deil”) - please (gratitude).

Sign language

Turks use body language that is unusual for Europeans. When coming to this country, be careful with the gestures that are familiar to you - for local residents they may have a different meaning.

So, turning your head left and right (our “no” gesture) does not mean denial at all. Most often, this is how Turks show misunderstanding - “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

A single nod of the head, like ours, means “Yes,” but the same gesture, accompanied by a click of the tongue, is a firm “No.” In general, clicking your tongue in Turkish culture is a sign of denial or disapproval of something.

Finger snapping, on the other hand, demonstrates a positive attitude. At the same time, it is impossible to replace this gesture with the familiar thumbs up - in Turkey this gesture is considered ugly.

To politely refuse an offer or thank someone for a favor in body language, you should place your hand on your chest.

On the street

The rules of behavior on the streets of Turkish cities and villages are dictated mainly by Islam. The more provincial the area, the stricter the morals and the more careful one should behave in public places.

There is no dress code as such, but remember:

You must not approach mosques and other religious sites wearing shorts, short skirts, sweatshirts or open-shoulder dresses.

Many tourists believe that beach fashion (swimsuits, pareos) can be transferred to the city streets. This is wrong. Promenade in a swimsuit or only shorts (without a top) looks strange, to say the least.

As for behavior on the beach, it is again worth remembering that the majority of Turks are Muslims. Topless sunbathing is not prohibited in many hotels. But still, by local standards it is vulgar.

If, while walking around the city, you suddenly want to take a photograph of a Turkish man, you should ask his permission; but photographing Turkish women (especially if they wear a headscarf) is not at all recommended.

Islam also leaves its mark on attitudes towards alcohol. A foreigner can buy alcohol in a store (the shelves with it are closed only during Ramadan), but they should not drink it in a public place. Also, Turks rarely eat on the go.

By the way, during the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, when believers abstain from food, water and smoking from sunrise to sunset, you should not eat or smoke in their presence. This will be your sign of respect that will not go unnoticed.

In transport

In large Turkish cities (Istanbul, Ankara), special electronic cards are used to pay for travel on state public transport.

If you run out of money on it, don't worry - the locals are very helpful. They often help visitors by paying for their travel with their card.

At the same time, it is unlikely that you will be able to thank them in return in cash - they won’t take it. If the Turks help, it is from the heart.

For a European, the Turkish transport system can seem like hell. (We are talking about large cities.) Drivers practically do not use turn signals - be careful! But they love to sound their horns. This is a way of “communication”. If in our country they honk to warn of danger, then in Turkey - for any reason (the green light does not light up for a long time, an acquaintance has passed by, someone is driving too slowly in front, etc., etc.).

When boarding the metro or tram there is a real crush. The fact is that the Turks do not wait for the arrivals to get out of the carriage, they simply climb forward, pushing everyone away.

On a bus or dolmuş (Turkish minibuses), if you have a choice of seats, do not sit next to an unknown woman if you are a man. This is not accepted. Girls, on the contrary, are better off choosing a seat next to the girls.

Away

Hospitality (misafirperverlik) is an important element of Turkish culture. Especially in the provinces. The guest is always offered the best, regardless of the family’s income.

It is difficult to refuse an invitation to visit (and it is better not to do this) - it is always furnished with a number of elegant excuses. If you really cannot accept it, then it is better to say that you are busy - the Turks will understand this reason.

As for gifts for the owners of the house, there is a saying in Turkey: “If you ate sweetly, you talked sweetly.” It can be taken literally - bring sweets as a gift. A souvenir from your country will also be an excellent present.

Did you see a pile of shoes in the entrance or in front of the house? Do not be surprised! This is a sure sign that Turks live here. In Turkey, it is not customary to take off shoes in the house (Turkish housewives monitor cleanliness); shoes are left outside the doorstep.

You will be offered slippers inside. In Turkish families, as a rule, there are special ones - “guests”. Don't like walking in other people's slippers? Bring your own. In Turkey, this act will be absolutely normal.

Turkish houses are usually divided into guest and private areas. Don't try to look behind closed doors or ask for a tour of the house - it's rude.

Also, in some conservative families it is not customary to start eating without the permission of an elder and even to smoke without his approval. By the way, many Turks smoke.

A visit is unlikely to last less than two hours. You will not only be given tea or coffee, but also deliciously fed. But it is not recommended to stay late.

At the table

It is worth distinguishing between a home meal and a meal in a restaurant.

In the first case, traditional Turkish lunch, as a rule, takes place in the presence of all family members. They eat at a low table, sitting cross-legged on the floor on pillows or mats. Feet are hidden under the table.

Dishes (usually three or more) are placed on a large tray and served on the table. From this tray you can put food on your plate (with your hands or with a shared spoon). But you need to do this only with your right hand and under no circumstances choose a better piece. This is the height of disrespect for the owners of the house.

On holidays, the national aniseed vodka raki (aka raki, aka rakia) is often placed on the table. After making a toast, clink only the bottoms of the glasses, and when placing the glass on the table, you need to think about those who could not be present with you.

At the table it is considered uncivil to talk without the permission of an elder, as well as to open your mouth wide (for example, to use a toothpick).

If you are offered to try some dish (the hostess’s signature dolma), you should not refuse, even if you are not hungry. Otherwise, you can offend the owners, and the questions “Isn’t it tasty?”, “Don’t you like it?” - cannot be avoided. You don't have to finish it all, but you should try.

As for lunch in a restaurant, here, most often, you can find a European style - ordinary tables, chairs, serving.

Turks, like us, love tea. It is drunk many times a day. This is done from special pear-shaped glass glasses without a handle. This shape allows you to keep the drink hot longer and admire its beautiful rich color.

Turks probably only like sweets more than tea. They eat sweets whenever they want: before lunch, after lunch, before tea, after tea. But never with tea. If you start eating, for example, Turkish delight as a snack with tea, they will look at you askance. Also, don't order tea at the same time as your main course (instead of soda to wash down your meal).

In cafes and other establishments it is customary to leave a tip.

Business Etiquette

Turkish business culture is dual: on the one hand, Turks try to do everything in a European way (business suits, business cards, handshakes), on the other hand, they cannot distance themselves from their roots.

Personal relationships play an important role in communicating with business partners. It is customary to strengthen them during negotiations, which are often informal.

Lunch or dinner is always paid by the host. You should not ask the size of the bill, or disclose it to your Turkish guests - this is a violation of etiquette.

Turkish businessmen are not always distinguished by German punctuality and straightforwardness. If possible, avoid strict deadlines and do not say categorically “No”. In Turkey, a polite refusal is a soft refusal.

At the beginning of a business meeting, it is customary to make compliments (for example, to the country, culture or company) and give souvenirs. During negotiations, Turkish partners can easily be distracted by their phones. Don't take it personally - this is just one of the features of Turkish.

In general, Turks are emphatically polite in business and expect this in return.

Bilmemek ayıp değil, sormamak öğrenmemek ayıp (It is shameful not to know - it is shameful not to learn. Turkish proverb)

Now you know how to behave in Turkey. Anything to add? Welcome to the comments.